COVID-19 Convictions

My life was orbiting around myself. That's like the precise definition of narcissism; being so focused on yourself that the focal point of everything you say and do is you. Then God knocked my center of gravity into a different galaxy; as a result, I lost myself. This is the point at which I really became a doctoral student; one who pursues real wisdom (not just knowledge) to help others (not just themselves). I got lost in space about 7 years ago and have traveled to various other planets, dimensions, and probably got lost in a dark hole or two. Gravity whisked me away so I could see all life forms as feasible friends instead of inevitable foes.

There is a quantum physicality to our individual existence - so insignificant unless we merge with others for purposes far great than our singular consciousness. So as I've progressed through this PhD program, my insignificance has dawned on me morning after morning until I finally woke up and greeted it with a smile. As the gravitational Grace of God guides me closer to Earth, I'm giddy about giving the fruits of my labor to others through the work I've been purposed to do. Being lost in space taught me that life is literally purposeless without a vision of the people you want your life to touch. 

A PhD is a life sentence of loving others through language, knowledge, truth, wisdom, and service to the furthest extent possible - even if it's lonely and requires self-sacrifice and a lower salary than people with less education. As a doctoral candidate, my life sentence has apparently already begun. I wake up each morning feeling gravity pulling me out of bed; reminding me of my mission. To boldly go forward and fight on the battlefield for Black, brown and poor people. One thing I know for sure is that a war was waged centuries ago against African American people - and all people - who have been historically dehumanized on this planet. And I was accepted into a training program that prepares warriors for battle. 

Plus, if I don't finish my dissertation, my ancestors will levitate over from the future and snatch me bald.